text only mode If you can read this text, then you should probably click this link.


This site should look good on most desktops using mainstream browsers now, but mobile is still mostly unsupported.

last public update: 2003-09-20

Phone Number, SSN, Credit Card, etc.

[insert portrait]
Actual name Zane Wright
Nationality American
Status Deceased
  • thinking and not doing
  • scripting
  • graphic design
  • doodling
  • doom mapping
  • Scatman John
  • Bing Soy
  • Kimberly Kubus
Most prized posession My old 3DS that barely works
Reggie is in the Mii Plaza, plus it's just really sentimental.
Hidden talent Can solve a 3x3 Rubiks Cube
Dream Start or join a VRML webring

Specimen No. 764

My existence

My (fake, self-given, internet) name is Burpo and I make things on da compooter. My major in college is multimedia digital design because of said things, but I do promise I go outside and eat grass like a normal human being. I'm not surgically attached to my computer and I only watch like 2 YouTube videos a day.

I began """programming""" at around first grade when I found out how to make batch files in Windows XP, which led to me making weird text based adventure games for myself. After destroying my Windows XP installation with adware, my mom put me on Ubuntu and got me into the really real stuff like LOLCODE and Piet. Debian is my daily driver OS now and I either put it or Linux Mint on everything I own.

As for my artistic inspiration, idk. My taste is very varied.


Debian logo

Why do I have a website?

It's fun to design websites.

My incredible username

I'm usually bad at sticking with usernames, but I like Burpo enough to use it consitently (even on here!). The entire reason I chose this name was because I saw a news report of a kid whose last name was Burpo and I thought it sounded funny. There's nothing crazy behind it.

Other names I may or may not be known by are death_by_penis and vomitkommando. The second one is kind of a common one on the internet so don't immediately assume I'm somewhere where I'm not.

My goal(s) here on Earth

There's nothing set in stone, but I like the ideas of making at least one Doom megawad, releasing a game, installing Gentoo on at least one thing, and possibly making a collection of short films. Music might be on the table, but I like too many different genres to know what I'd do.

I'd also like to have at least one world record, but I don't know what that will be yet.


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bonus info
  • kevin robinson from school fuck you kevin stop showin evryone my fuckin deviantart you peace of shit
  • taskbars that sort programs alphabetically
  • visually flat / minimalist websites that are bloated under the hood
  • twitter people that non-stop complain about how bad twitter and elon are even though they won't stop using twitter
  • Halo 4
  • HD universe GTA games that aren't Chinatown Wars. I love and hate IV
Music Hyper pop songs that aren't the funny monkey song
  • Devil's Pass
  • Top Gun 2
Food Whoppers, as in the candy
  • chocolate bacon soder (actual thing that exists and tastes rancid)
  • white wine